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Dealing With Death Can Be Depressing
By Maridsa A

Everyone deals with death in a different way. Some people show no emotion when a loved one dies. Showing no emotion, doesn't mean that you have no pain in your heart. Some people hide and cry every time they have a memory about their loved one.

I lost my brother about a year ago and it has been very hard for me. My brother was one year older than me. He took his life. He committed suicide. There are times that I am so depressed inside. As I write this article, my tears are running down my cheeks. I have never felt so much pain in my heart.

As a child my brother has always been there for me through good and bad. He taught me how to ride a bike. We always played together and we also fought a lot as siblings that we were. He taught me to swim and many other things. I had just started my new job when I was informed by my parents that my brother has decided to depart from us all. I knew exactly what they meant by that. I have a lot of questions in my mind, in which I will never have an answer for. I know he was having a lot of personal issues. I thought my brother was stronger than that. I guess it was too much for him to handle. I get very depressed at times when I think of him.

I have his car parked in front of my house. His car needs some work, it is not drivable at this time. There are days that I come from work and when I pass his car to enter my house, my tears just roll down my face. I picture him in his car. Some of my friends tell me to sell it, but I can't. I know the car won't bring back my brother but I feel as if I have a piece of him. The car has sentimental value to me. I am going to fix it and drive it sometimes. This has been a very hard year for me. I have cried more this year than I have my entire life. I sometimes have dreams with him and I wake sad because it was just a dream. At work people speak about their childhood. Their stories for the most part include a sibling and I cannot even touch the subject because it is very hard for me. For everyone out there who has lost a brother or a loved one, you know what I mean. Dealing with death can be depressing.


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