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Regaining Hope Through Grief
Counseling After Losing a Loved One
By Jenn Weesies
After the passing of a loved one, family and friends may
experience intense feelings of grief. Grief plagues them
with hopelessness, anger, despair, loss of direction,
deep sadness and a great feeling of loss. Losing a
family member or close friend is not something that a
person "simply gets over" or even "just gets through";
they must come to terms with the loss, recognize the
positive aspects of the situation, and continue on with
their life as a happy, healthy person.
In 1969 Elisabeth Kbler-Ross described the five stages
of grief as:
• Denial
• Anger
• Bargaining
• Depression
• Acceptance
For most, the stages do not progress in a systematic
manner. Any of the stages can happen at any time
throughout the process, and avoiding grieving will only
cause them to be prolonged. Grief counseling is a
powerful tool that can help those who have lost loved
ones regain hope and move positively through the five
stages of grief.
Grief counseling addresses the challenges that present
themselves after losing a loved one and confronts them
head on. It helps that person cope with the natural
reactions to loss in a way that allows them to continue
with their everyday life. The counseling may be carried
out through individual sessions but is most common in
group sessions. Typically grief counseling in a group
setting allows for people to share their similar
feelings with one another and not feel so isolated by
their situation. The meetings can be led by the group
collectively, a professional or a grief counselor.
Grief counseling teaches those who have lost someone
close to them methods to reduce unhealthy coping
mechanisms. It allows the person to express their
emotions and talk through the recovery process. The goal
of grief counseling is to help a person reach the
acceptance stage of grief. It is at this juncture that
the person can experience sadness without it crippling
their everyday functions. They can slowly begin to feel
peace about the loss.
Grief counseling differs from grief therapy in that the
behavior does not need to be stopped or changed. The
role of the group, professional, or counselor is to be
there for the grieving person and actively listen to
what they are expressing. This allows the person to
expel the emotions in a healthy manner without rushing
or avoiding the feelings, stages and overall process of
grief.
After losing a loved one some funeral homes will refer
the family and friends to grief counseling sessions. It
is important to understand that not everyone grieves in
the same manner. Some will jump on the opportunity to
participate, while others will shrink away and wish to
spend reflective time by themselves. Grief counseling is
an excellent tool for those who are debilitated by grief
in that it helps them regain hope and functionality in
their lives. In the unfortunate loss of a loved one, it
is strongly encouraged to incorporate such sessions into
the planning process. |
