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Tips to Write a Good Funeral Speech
By Samantha Joy Pearce
Funerals are incredibly difficult, upsetting and
stressful events that unfortunately we generally all
have to experience at some point in our lives. The
thought of speaking at a funeral, especially in a formal
way, can be hugely daunting. You know that everyone will
be watching you expectantly, and it can be difficult to
judge the tone on the actual day of the event; it may be
that the guests of the funeral are looking for some
light relief from the pressures of a very formal service
and so there is an expectation that you add a small
amount of humour into the speech. In the same way, it
could be that you need to be incredibly formal in the
way in which you deliver your speech, as the family have
particularly asked that this tone is retained throughout
the service.
There is however a bit of a formula to speech writing,
and this formula also applies to writing speeches for
funerals. Whilst it may seem a little cold to follow a
speech-writing formula for eulogy writing, do remember
that the congregation or the audience will be expecting
you to cover some basic formalities and will be
expecting a particular format of speech to be followed.
It is also important to consider just how stressful
speaking at a funeral can be - the more you can do to
ease this task for yourself, the better.
So, what is that standard funeral speech writing format?
Well, nowadays it is usual for one or two paragraphs to
be dedicated to the following areas; general opening or
introduction, the individual's early years, their time
spent at school and / or their working life, marriage or
significant relationships, the individuals hobbies, your
own personal memories of the individual, a few closing
words.
It may be that you didn't actually know the individual
all that well, and so if this is the case, it makes more
sense for you to ask friends and family of the deceased
for some of their favourite memories of the individual
before you plan your speech. These can then be used in
the last section of your speech. Include between 4 and 6
memories. By using other people's memories, you'll find
that you can relate to the audience a little more.
Furthermore, it is a nice idea to include in the closing
words section of your speech a phrase or a lyric that
the deceased often used or liked. Something that is
poignant and relevant to the situation, and if possible,
that is also uplifting. This enables your speech to end
on a more positive and celebratory note.
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